CHOCOLATE: A FOODIE FABLE

[ 0 ] October 7, 2025 | Contributor

When Chocolate met Peanut Butter, they were both single. So, Peanut Butter asked Chocolate if they could hang out together.

“Sure,” answered Chocolate, “that sounds cool, but I want you to know now rather than later, I’m a player.”

“A player?” questioned Peanut Butter.

Well, it wasn’t very long before Peanut Butter understood just what Chocolate meant. Peanut Butter caught Chocolate hanging out with Peanut without Butter. And, though Caramel and Peanut were best friends, Peanut caught Chocolate with Caramel on several compromising occasions, not to mention his on again off again trysts with Coconut and Raisin.

At that point, Peanut Butter said, forget about it, I’m gonna just go hang out with Jelly.

Chocolate, ever on the prowl, ran into Vanilla “What’s new man, what you up to these days, met anybody new?” Vanilla knew better than to tell Chocolate about his new love, Ice Cream, the pretty young thing that was rocking his world, so he said, “Nah man nothing new on this end.”

Chocolate, ever the hound, had already heard about Ice Cream and knew it was just a matter of time before he would win her over like he did all the others.

Once Chocolate had had his fling with Ice Cream, he was ready to move on to other conquests. One day he was snooping around in the kitchen cupboard and came across Marshmallow, and you KNOW what happened next. That turned out to be a sitting around the camp fire, night thing, your basic booty call.

When Chocolate met Strawberry, it was magic, for the moment. Then Strawberry ended up like all the rest, a fling. Which didn’t sit too well with her and she vowed that she would show Chocolate one day that she would not be minimized. As it turns out, that day came at a cousin’s wedding.

Chocolate, Vanilla, and Strawberry got invited to Broccoli and Carrot’s wedding. Peanut Butter and Marshmallow didn’t get invited for obvious reasons, too sticky. Chocolate and Vanilla got invited everywhere, also for obvious reasons, they always fit in. Strawberry didn’t get invited everywhere like Chocolate and Vanilla, but that was about to change.

At the wedding, the bride, Broccoli, was radiant in her beautiful winter green gown and Carrot, the groom, stood tall and handsome in his olive-orange Tux. Celery performed the wedding ceremony and Broccoli and Carrot vowed to stay together forever and the rest as you know is medical history.

Since Chocolate was still single and still playing the field, no one trusted him around anyone but Vegetable, so Chocolate was seated next to Vegetable’s daughter, Lettuce, at the wedding reception. Since Lettuce had absolutely no interest whatsoever in Chocolate, Chocolate quickly turned his attention to Mousse who was sitting one table over across from him. Though Mousse was not quite his type, too fat, they hit it off long enough to get Chocolate through the reception.

Of course, the reception was boring to Chocolate until Strawberry entered wearing her most stunning red. But Strawberry to his dismay, sashayed by him as she made her way to the head table where her cousin, the bride, was waiting to introduce her to Champagne. Champagne and Strawberry hit it off right away. It was practically love at first sight. After that, Champagne and Strawberry went everywhere together, and they were invited to everything, birthdays, anniversaries, brunches, and of course, New Years Eve.

Seeing Chocolate’s disappointment as she walked by him in that one brief second at the reception was vindication enough for Strawberry and she and Champagne lived happily ever after.

Chocolate on the other hand was just “lifeing,” from pillar to post, everywhere and with everyone and anyone who would “hang” with him.

I’ll stop here, ‘cause I can see I’m out of time, but one day when you are not in a hurry, I’ll tell you about what happened when Chocolate met Doughnut and the fight that ensued between Chocolate and Coffee over Doughnut. And the day Cookie and Doughnut had a big tete-a-tete over Chocolate; because, if the truth be told, player or not, just about everybody I know love Chocolate.